Learning & Development

Structured Problem Solving: Working Towards Wellbeing - YouTube

Mindfulness: Working Towards Wellbeing - YouTube

Working Towards Wellbeing: Talking About What Really Matters - YouTube

Wellbeing: chair exercises - YouTube

Wellbeing: breathing exercise - YouTube

Wellbeing: visualisation exercise - YouTube

Square Breathing: Working Towards Wellbeing - YouTube

Worry Time: Working Towards Wellbeing - YouTube

Managing Strong Emotions: Working Towards Wellbeing - YouTube

Worthwhile Wellbeing Videos - EAP Assist

Addressing the Risk for Effects of Trauma in the Mental Health of Women Across the Lifecourse - YouTube

Case Study Mornington Clinic One   

Gender: Male

Age: 36

Medications at the commencement of treatment: Sertraline 100mg, Bupropion 150mg

Diagnosis: OCD, GAD and Depression

Protocol: SMA & L)iTBS

X5 sessions per week, tapering down at session 30A, for 35 sessions

Mental State at intake consultation:

Goals at commencement of treatment Session 1A:

To decrease medication used for low mood, panic attacks, intrusive thoughts.

Decrease anxiety, increase in mood.

To increase motivation, begin to enjoy activities Pt previously engaged in.

Outcome:

As levels of anxiety decreased and mood increased over the 35 treatment sessions Pt was able to engage with others with more ease, seeing their partner more regularly, by session 35A Pt had moved into partners home. Pt re-engaged with their football club. Pt reported attending regular encounters with family and babysitting his nieces. Pt reported taking on a role as a caregiver to partners son. Pt reported complete remission of depressive symptoms, intrusive thoughts and anxiety only peeking at times when external stressors where present, Pt stating able to manage external stressors. Pt booked a holiday to Fiji with partner and his extended family  and plans to propose to his partner in 6 months time.

With direction from their private psychiatrist Pt began decreasing medication at session 35A. Sertraline from 100mg to 50mg, with the option for 15 maintenance sessions in 4 months time.

See Below Psychometrics Scores from throughout treatment:

Patient Health Questionnaire (PHQ-9)

Depression Anxiety Stress Scale (DASS 10)

The DASS-10 is a 10 item self-report measure that assesses overall levels of psychological distress, along with levels of depression and anxiety/stress during the past week. The total score for psychological distress is presented, along with the average scores for the depression, and anxiety/stress subscales. A change in score by 5 +, up or down, across time, indicates reliable change in functioning (i.e., reliable change calculation).

Reliable Change Calculation

Psychological Distress

Depression and Anxiety/Stress Subscales

Generalized Anxiety Disorder

The GAD-7 is a self-report measure comprising 7-items, which measures anxiety severity over the previous two weeks. The total score ranges from 0 to 21, with higher scores indicating more severe levels of anxiety.

Obsessive-Compulsive Inventory – Revised (OCI-R)

The Obsessive-Compulsive Inventory – Revised (OCI-R) is an 18-item self-report questionnaire that measures the level of distress or bother that OCD symptoms have caused in the past month.

World Health Organisation Disability Assessment Schedule 2.0

The World Health Organisation Disability Assessment Schedule 2.0 (WHODAS) is a 12-item self-report questionnaire assessing disability due to all factors (all diagnoses and illnesses, psychological and physical) over the prior month. Higher scores indicate more severe disability and functional impairment.

Conversations Matter

by EAP Assist | Jan 19, 2024 

Conversations Matter is a practical online resource to support safe and effective community discussions about suicide.

Whether you’re looking for resources for yourself or your community, there are a range of practical resources relevant for individuals, families, community groups, workplaces and educational settings available.

Check it out at: https://conversationsmatter.org.au/?mc_cid=6bbcc39fce&mc_eid=5ffc7e9577

My Grief App

by EAP Assist | Jan 16, 2024

MyGrief app provides support to grieving people and those who support them – in the palm of their hands. Grief Australia’s MyGrief app provides information, tools and resources to support grieving Australians, while providing practical strategies for families and friends on how best to support someone who is grieving.

iOS https://apps.apple.com/au/app/mygrief/id1485182615?mc_cid=6bbcc39fce&mc_eid=5ffc7e9577

Android https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.digitalnoir.ACGB&mc_cid=6bbcc39fce&mc_eid=5ffc7e9577&pli=1

For more Apps go to: https://eapassist.com.au/wellness-apps/

5 Types of Negative Self-Talk

by EAP Assist | Dec 9, 2023 

We like to think we’re optimistic, positive people. After all, no one wants to be considered a grump. Besides, isn’t that what we’re taught from the time we’re children, to smile and think the best of those around us? In truth, we don’t always quite hit the mark. We might mean to be positive, but those negative thoughts have a way of creeping in, especially if we’re tired or anxious. Strong emotion has a way of derailing us, as do the negative influences around us. In short, we’re constantly being broadsided by negativity, and we can’t help but respond in kind. How do we learn to recognise when our self-talk is turning negative and stop it before it gains a foothold in our lives? We start by learning how to identify the most common culprits.

Black and White Thinking
The minute you start using ‘all’ or ‘nothing’ statements you’re already falling into a negative mindset. When this comes up, the best thing to do is to remind yourself the world doesn’t really work that way. In fact, there are more shades of grey than you might think.

Tunnel Vision
When you can only see the bad in everything, it’s no wonder you can feel lost in a sea of despair and negative self-talk. Here you see the world as only negative and seek out proof by pointing out every flaw or failure. This is defeated by rewording the statements as they come up. Look for the positive spin you can put on things.

The Disaster Plan
When you can only see the negative outcome in everything. For this, accept that sometimes, failure happens. You can even use dire predictions to work out a ‘plan B’ in case you need one, but also remember to remind yourself there’s also a chance of success in what you try. There’s no reason to assume the worst.

Anticipation
In this, you assume you know what someone else is thinking, and it’s never good. To combat it try having an honest conversation with the person instead. Let them speak for themselves. They might even surprise you. Again, quit assuming the worst.

The Guilty Conscience
You messed up. Once. A long time ago. It’s time to let it go. For some people, their brains are expert at bringing up the past, regardless of how much time has passed or what you’ve done to correct the mistake. Here you need to remind yourself of the lessons you’ve learned. Remember, the past is in the past. Look forward, seeing the possibilities. Let go of the rest.

FIGHTING KIDS

by EAP Assist | Jan 17, 2024

If you’re a parent or carer with more than one child, you probably have high hopes they’ll get along. Maybe even become the best of friends. However, the reality can be very different, and dealing with kids who are always fighting can be a stressful and ongoing issue. So how can you help keep the peace – or give it more of a chance? Here are some tips to help you feel less like a referee, and encourage more of the behaviours you want to see:

IS IT NORMAL FOR SIBLINGS TO FIGHT?
Yes, it is normal for siblings to have disagreements. They may argue, bicker, blame, refuse to share, become highly competitive, jealous or even get physical when they’re upset with each other. There are times when one starts things more than the other, and then it switches. Sometimes, they can get along well for weeks at a time. Then it can feel like they can’t breathe the same air without arguing. Depending on their ages, different challenges may come up, too. For example, toddlers can struggle with sharing, while older children often experience feelings of unfairness or comparison.

Generally, kids go through all kinds of developmental changes and events that can lead to, or intensify, arguments and fights. As frustrating as it can be, sibling rivalry is usually about learning. Children are testing, practising and developing important life skills like problem-solving, compromising, collaborating and getting along with others. They’re learning how to manage and express big emotions. Sibling relationships can be a ‘training ground’ to develop these skills. As they learn, things won’t always go smoothly. Seeing the bigger picture can help you deal with tricky situations a little more calmly.

THE POWER OF POSITIVE, ONE-ON-ONE ATTENTION
Children crave connection from parents and carers. And when they feel like they must compete with their siblings for attention and quality time, conflicts can happen. Family life is busy, and giving each child proper one-on-one time can be challenging. The good news is you can do many little things to help them feel unique and important.

For example, if you’re cooking dinner and one of your children shows interest, invite them to help you stir or chop the ingredients. Give them a gentle touch on the shoulder, a smile or a kind word as you pass by. Or you could come up with a fun bedtime phrase just for them. Taking a genuine interest in their thoughts and feelings can also help. When they come to you with something to share or tell, take the time to really tune in. Small acts of positive attention can make a big difference.

AVOIDING COMPARISON FOR BETTER SIBLING RELATIONSHIPS
To help kids build strong relationships with each other, it is best to avoid making comparisons. Saying things like “Why can’t you be more like your brother?” or “Your sister can do it, why can’t you?” can cause siblings to feel resentful, jealous or inadequate. The same goes for when kids are playing with their friends. It’s important to avoid any accidental comparisons, which can help prevent any misunderstandings or conflicts.

To create a supportive atmosphere where kids get along better, try to recognise and celebrate each child’s unique strengths and interests. For example, if one child likes art while the other is drawn to sports, encourage them to pursue their interests. Praise their efforts, not just their results. To add another layer to this, try to avoid comparing your children’s progress against each other. For example, if one child learnt to ride a bike earlier than the other, or is getting higher marks at school, try not to compare their progress. Encourage children to be themselves, with their own strengths. This will help them feel valued and encouraged to grow and learn at their own pace.

USING DESCRIPTIVE PRAISE FOR POSITIVE BEHAVIOURS
When you feel like you’re holding your breath until the next drama happens, it’s easy to forget to notice when things are going well. For example, when you catch them playing together and sharing peacefully, take a moment to recognise their positive behaviour with some descriptive praise.

Instead of using broad statements like “Well done” or “Good job”, try being a little more specific. For example, you could say something like, “It’s great to see you playing so nicely together. You’re sharing your toys and taking turns so well. Keep it up, I’m proud of you.” If you notice caring or empathetic behaviour of one child towards their sibling, try to pay attention to it and praise it. For example, “That’s so kind of you, trying to comfort your brother after he’s hurt himself. Look at how you’ve helped him settle down.” Descriptive praise like this reinforces the positive behaviours you want to see.

SETTING CLEAR AND CONSISTENT HOUSE RULES
“It’s not fair!”
“She started it!”
‘No, I didn’t, they did!”
Sound familiar? Sibling relationships can be tricky, especially when there’s a big age gap or different capabilities, or when children think they’re being treated unfairly. A few clear and consistent family rules can boost fairness and co-operation, and reduce feelings of competition and resentment.

Find a moment when everyone is relaxed and involve them in creating a few guidelines such as “We speak kindly to each other” or “We take turns with toys and devices.” Next time they have a disagreement, take a deep breath and try to stay calm. Remind them of the relevant family rule, without blaming anyone. For example, “What’s the rule about speaking kindly to each other?” Encourage positive behaviour and give them a little time to figure out what to do next. They might even surprise you by resolving the issue themselves. However, if they can’t seem to work it out, you might want to consider a fair and brief consequence. For example, take away the toy or game that’s causing the drama for five minutes. Let them know they’ll get it back so they can try again.

LEADING BY EXAMPLE
When you find yourself caught in the middle of an argument, it can be difficult to feel calm and approach the situation positively. Even so, leading by example can be one of the most effective ways to encourage the behaviours you would like to see in your children.

Think about how you respond and react to disagreements and problem-solving. Children are always watching and learning from the adults around them. Role modelling the behaviour you want to see can help children learn to regulate their emotions, compromise, problem-solve and be kind to others. It may not be the immediate solution, yet it can be one of the most effective strategies in the long run.

WORKING TOGETHER TO RESOLVE CONFLICTS
When kids argue, it can be a chance to teach them how to talk things out and find a middle ground. For example, if they’re caught up in a disagreement about which game to play, try to avoid making the decision or choosing for them. Instead, you could encourage them to find a solution where both can have fun, like playing one game for 15-30 minutes, then switching to another game. Even if they can’t agree, you can ask them what they think would be a fair solution.

Though it might not always go smoothly, you’re encouraging creative thinking and problem-solving skills. This can also help them feel empowered and respected, which can lead to less rivalry over time.

TAKING A STEP BACK
While toddlers and young children need more guidance and support, older children are often capable of solving some problems themselves. Even though it can be tempting to jump in and help, giving them space to resolve things independently (or with a little less guidance) can be unexpectedly effective. Next time, consider taking a step back and watching from a slight distance to see how they might handle it themselves. Sometimes, giving them a chance to work things out on their own can lead to surprising results.

R U Angry

by EAP Assist | Dec 7, 2023

Anger Expression Skills

You can’t avoid people or things that anger or irritate you – but you can learn to control how you react to them. You can practice using the anger you experience positively to give you the energy and determination to accomplish your goals.

• Stay away from substances that increase your anger and irritability. Anger is usually harder to control when you are stressed, tired or have had a few drinks or taken stimulant substances like speed, cocaine and steroids. If you have a difficult situation to deal with, it’s better to have a clear head.

• Use a Daily Mood Chart to plot episodes of anger or irritability, as well as any other events that may be related (e.g. intake of caffeine, other substances, sleep pattern, life events).

• Become aware of ‘trigger points’ for irritability or impulsivity, your anger signals. Find your own range of strategies for dealing with these (e.g., exercise, discuss the situation with others, use problem solving sheet).

• Practise relaxation techniques such as breathing control and using imagery to visualise being calmly and completely in control to help calm down angry feelings.

• Listen to how you come across to others: Change your language. Angry people tend to demand things. Try saying “I would like”, rather than “I demand” or “I must have it” or “You must”. Then if you are unable to get what you want you’ll feel frustration and disappointment, rather than anger.

You may decide to tell the other person you’ll talk about it later when you’ve calmed down or thought about it a bit more. Sometimes putting it down on paper or talking it through with someone else first can help get more perspective.

• Use a Mood Chart to plot anger and irritability as well as depression, disappointment, your use of stimulants and alcohol which can assist in breaking down problems into manageable steps.

Your Anger Responses

• To gain more insight into anger or impulsivity, think about a typical occasion when you were angry or impulsive and consider the following:
1. What happened…? Was this a ‘one off’ or part of a pattern?
2. What effect did your behaviour have on the situation? On you? On others?
3. Was it useful…? Were you satisfied/content with the end result?…
4. How did those around you feel? Would you do it again the same way?
5. Would you change anything next time?

• It can be useful to consider what messages you were brought up with concerning expression of anger. Have a think about your family‘s messages and how they dealt (or failed to deal) with frustration and anger.

• It can be particularly useful to consider what models you have from family members (for women, how your mother/sisters dealt with anger, for men your father/brothers). Instead of telling yourself: “It’s terrible – everything’s ruined…” Try saying: “It’s frustrating, and it’s understandable that I’m upset about it, but it’s not the end of the world and getting angry is not going to fix it anyhow.”

Let it RAIN

by EAP Assist | Dec 6, 2023

Mindfulness and the RAIN practice (Recognize, Allow, Investigate, Nurture) can play a significant role in fostering brave connections by promoting self-awareness, empathy and a willingness to engage with vulnerability. Here are four actionable steps you can take to integrate mindfulness and the RAIN practice into your journey of building brave connections:

1. Embrace Mindful Self-Reflection: Start by setting aside a few minutes each day for mindful self-reflection. This practice helps you become more aware of your emotions, reactions, and biases. By understanding your own inner world, you lay the foundation for building genuine connections with others.
2. Apply the RAN Meditation Practice to Tough Interactions. When facing challenging interactions, use the RAIN practice to navigate through them:
1. Recognize: Take a moment to acknowledge your feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations.
2. Allow: Give yourself permission to experience these emotions without judgment or suppression.
3. Investigate: Dig deeper into the underlying emotions and triggers, gaining insight into your responses.
4. Nurture: Offer yourself compassion, recognizing that vulnerability is part of being human.
3. Practice Empathetic Listening with Mindful Presence: In your conversations, practice empathetic listening through mindfulness. Be fully present as the speaker shares, focusing on their words, emotions, and body language. By doing so, you create a safe environment where others can express themselves authentically.
4. Embrace Mindful Bravery Beyond Comfort Zones: Utilize mindfulness to navigate unfamiliar territory. Notice any resistance or fear that arises when connecting with individuals different from you. Through mindfulness, acknowledge these feelings and choose to step into discomfort with an open mind, nurturing brave connections.

Integrating mindfulness and the RAIN practice into your daily life helps to equip you with emotional intelligence, self-awareness and empathy. These qualities can support you to establish authentic connections that are grounded in understanding and authenticity.

Pleasing People

by EAP Assist | Nov 29, 2023 

People-pleasing can be a hard habit to break. Here are 10 signs that you may be trying too hard to please everyone:

1. You pretend to agree with everyone.
Listening politely to other people’s opinions — even when you disagree — is a good social skill. But pretending to agree just because you want to be liked can cause you to engage in behaviour that goes against your values.
2. You feel responsible for how other people feel.
It’s healthy to recognize how your behaviour influences others but thinking you have the power to make someone happy is a problem. It’s up to each individual to be in charge of their own emotions.
3. You apologise often.
Whether you excessively blame yourself, or fear other people are always blaming you, frequent apologies can be a sign of a bigger problem. You don’t have to be sorry for being you.
4. You feel burdened by the things you have to do.
You’re in charge of how you spend your time. But if you are a people-pleaser, there’s a good chance your schedule is filled with activities that you think other people want you to do.
5. You can’t say no.
Whether you say yes and then actually follow through, or you later fake an illness to get out your commitments, you’ll never reach your goals if you can’t speak up for yourself.
6. You feel uncomfortable if someone is angry at you.
Just because someone is mad doesn’t necessarily mean you did anything wrong but if you can’t stand the thought of someone being upset with you, you’ll be more likely to compromise your values.
7. You act like the people around you.
It’s normal for other people to bring out different sides of your personality but people-pleasers often sabotage their goals. Studies show that people-pleasers engage in self-destructive behaviour if they think it will help others feel more comfortable in social situations. For example, people-pleasers eat more when they think it will make other people happy.
8. You need praise to feel good.
While praise and kind words can make anyone feel good, people pleasers depend on validation. If your self-worth rests entirely on what others think about you, you’ll only feel good when others shower you with compliments.
9. You go to great lengths to avoid conflict.
It’s one thing not to want to start conflict. But avoiding conflict at all costs means that you’ll struggle to stand up for the things — and the people — you really believe in.
10. You don’t admit when your feelings are hurt.
You can’t form authentic relationships with people unless you’re willing to speak up sometimes and say that your feelings are hurt. Denying that you’re angry, sad, embarrassed, or disappointed — even when you’re emotionally wounded — keeps a relationship superficial.

While it’s important to impress others and show that you can be agreeable, being subservient could backfire. You’ll never reach your greatest potential if you’re trying to be all things to all people. Start getting out of the people-pleasing habit by saying no to something small. Express your opinion about something simple. Or take a stand for something you believe in. Each step you take will help you gain more confidence in your ability to be yourself.

Burning Out

by EAP Assist | Nov 28, 2023

Burnout is a combination of emotional exhaustion, negativity and reduced sense of personal accomplishment. It can occur if you’ve been experiencing persistent and unrelenting stress.

Burnout has some common signs and symptoms. It’s possible to experience some of these during periods of stress without feeling burnt out. However, if you’re exhibiting these symptoms and feeling emotionally overloaded, you may be experiencing burnout.

Some signs of burnout include: low energy, low motivation, low mood, feeling isolated. feeling trapped, feeling cynical or disengaged from work that you used to value, decreased life satisfaction, procrastination, irritability, feeling exhausted and drained. disrupted sleep, headaches and body pain.

Burnout has a number of causes, such as working in an environment that’s challenging, high pressured or that expects too much of you and doesn’t recognise your successes. And it’s not just limited to the workplace: burnout can also be caused by a home life where you have too many responsibilities or where you lack the support you need. Sometimes burnout can be exacerbated by particular thinking styles, such as having unrealistic expectations of ourselves and others, or by perfectionism and associated pressures.If you’re feeling burnt out, there are a variety of strategies that can be helpful including:

• Mindfulness and emotion regulation – Relaxation exercises can help you calm your emotions and regain perspective. Talking about your feelings can also help you alleviate the strong emotions associated with burnout, so consider confiding in a trusted colleague, friend or family member.
• Set boundaries – Trying to be all things to all people can leave you feeling stressed and overwhelmed. Set some boundaries by talking to colleagues, friends and family members about what you can do on your own and what help you might need help with. As well as helping you manage your workload, this process can help the people around you understand your limits.
• Managing your time – Planning important tasks ahead of time can provide structure in your day-to-day life and prevent you from overextending yourself. Stick to working on these tasks only during the periods you’ve allocated to complete them and use any personal time to pursue activities that you enjoy.
• Asking for help –Try choosing one thing you know you can delegate and then assess how helpful it was to have that task off your plate.
• Problem solve – One of the best ways to reduce stress is to address the stressors themselves. Take 15 minutes to write down a problem that is making you feel overwhelmed and come up with three possible solutions. At the end of the 15 minutes, give one solution a try and see what happens. If that doesn’t work, you have two more solutions ready to go. If nothing’s working, it might be time to ask a colleague or manager for their perspective.

Stay Strong Plan Tool for Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islanders

by EAP Assist | Nov 24, 2023

A new, interactive, mental health and wellbeing tool, the Digital Stay Strong Plan has been launched at Menzies School of Health Research. The interactive document is designed to improve culturally safe care for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people. The tool is aimed at strengthening connections, goal setting and self-management of mental wellbeing.

To access: https://www.menzies.edu.au/page/Resources/Digital_Stay_Strong_Plan/

Managing Psychosocial Hazards

by EAP Assist | Nov 21, 2023

Mental health conditions accounted for 9% of all serious workers’ compensation claims in 2020-21, a 55.6% increase since 2016-17. On average, work-related psychological injuries have longer recovery times, higher costs and require more time away from work. Managing psychosocial hazards at work not only protects workers, it also benefits businesses by improving organisational performance and productivity.

Psychosocial hazards are those that can cause harm through creating stress. While stress itself is not an injury, if it becomes frequent, prolonged or severe, stress can cause psychological and physical harm. These may include:
· Job demands
· Low job control
· Poor support
· Lack of role clarity
· Poor organisational change management
· Inadequate reward and recognition
· Poor organisational justice
· Traumatic events or material
· Remote or isolated work
· Poor physical environment
· Violence and aggression
· Bullying
· Harassment, including sexual harassment
· Conflict or poor workplace relationships and interactions.

Psychological harm or injuries from psychosocial hazards include conditions such as anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder and sleep disorders. Psychosocial hazards can also lead to physical injuries, including musculoskeletal injury, chronic disease and injury following fatigue-related workplace incidents.

As with any health and safety risk at work employers have a primary duty to eliminate or minimise psychosocial risks so far as is reasonably practicable. It’s important to consult with workers who may be directly affected by particular psychosocial hazards and in doing so suggesting they speak with an EAP Assist counsellor.

Practicing Mindfulness Meditation

by EAP Assist | Oct 25, 2023 

There are countless mindfulness techniques — each rooted in a different tradition and with a unique focus — most have one thing in common: they’re aimed at cultivating two essential components, calm and clarity, with the intention to remain focused and hone a natural quality of awareness.

Eight meditation techniques that cultivate mindfulness
Here’s a breakdown of eight of the more popular mindfulness techniques. Some will sound intriguing, while others may not be your cup of tea. See which ones work best for you.

1. Focused Attention: Likely the most common form of meditation, this technique uses the breath to anchor the mind and maintain awareness. Focus your attention on the breath — specifically the rise and fall of the chest — and return to the breath whenever you get distracted or notice your mind starting to wander.
2. Body Scan: This technique, which uses meditation to connect with the body, involves scanning your body from head to toe and being aware of any discomfort, sensations, or aches that exist.
3. Noting: This is a mindfulness technique in which you “note” a particular thought or feeling when you become distracted during meditation. The practice of noting helps to create space and learn more about our habits, tendencies, and conditioning.
4. Loving Kindness: Instead of focusing on the breath, this technique involves focusing on the image of different people: people we know, people we don’t; people we like, people we don’t. We direct well-wishes and goodwill first to ourselves, and then, as a ripple effect, to others, which helps us let go of unhappy feelings we may be experiencing.
5. Skilful Compassion: This one involves focusing on a person you know or love and paying attention to the sensations arising from the heart. It’s aptly named because it’s thought to be helpful in opening our hearts and minds for the benefit of other people, which in turn fosters a feeling of happiness in our own mind.
6. Visualization: This technique uses visualization, to focus on a person or something more abstract, to hold attention. The idea here is that the familiar image will help create and maintain a relaxed focus.
7. Resting Awareness: Rather than focusing on the breath or a visualization, this technique involves letting the mind rest; thoughts may enter, but instead of distracting you and pulling you away from the present moment, they simply leave.
8. Reflection: For this technique, ask yourself a question, for example, “What are you most grateful for?” (Note that asking yourself a question using the second person — you — will discourage the intellectual mind from trying to answer it rationally.) Be aware of the feelings, not the thoughts, that arise when you focus on the question.

Discovering Yourself

by EAP Assist | Nov 17, 2023

Finding out who you are is a complex and ongoing process that can take a lifetime. It involves self-reflection, self- awareness and personal growth. Here are some strategies that can help find out who you are:

1. Self-reflection- take time to think about your values, beliefs and priorities. Its important to ask yourself questions such as ‘What do I value in life’ ‘What are my core beliefs and principles?’ ‘What are my passions and interests” ‘What makes me happy and content”
2. Explore your interests by engaging in different activities, hobbies and experiences to better understand your likes and dislikes. Trying new things can help you discover what you are passionate about.
3. Seek feedback- ask family, friends or trusted individuals for their perspective on your strengths, weaknesses and personality traits. Sometimes others can offer valuable insights.
4. Journalling- writing about your thoughts, feelings and experiences regularly can serve as a powerful self-discovery tool. Patterns and insights may emerge over time.
5. Self-awareness- pay attention to your thoughts, emotions and reactions in various situations. Mindfulness practices such as meditation can help you become more aware.
6. Learn from life experiences- train yourself to view setbacks as opportunities for growth and not being a failure. Accept that challenging times and setbacks are a part of the journey and can be a source of learning.
7. Identify your core values and principles. These are the guiding beliefs that shape your decisions and actions.
8. Set short term and long- term goals. Your aspirations can provide clarity on your desires and priorities.
9. Connect with your identity by considering your cultural background, heritage and personal history. Understanding your roots can be an important part of your self-discovery.
10. Embrace change. Keep in mind that your sense of self is evolving. Be open to change and growth as you discover yourself.
11. Be patient- self-discovery is a lifelong journey and its ok not to have the answers immediately. Embrace uncertainty and enjoy the process of getting to know yourself along the way.

Six Effective Evidence-Based Strategies for Overcoming Social Anxiety

by EAP Assist | Oct 24, 2023

The best way to improve our mental health is to improve our sleep, diet or exercise habits and routines. The catch is that it’s not always easy to form better habits around these things. Have you ever said to yourself “Why can’t I stick to my new running routine, or I keep saying I won’t look at my phone before bed” but still do. We often say these things to ourselves but struggle to implement change. Research shows there are a couple of reasons for this. Many of us start with a big goal – like giving up smoking cold turkey, without breaking it down into smaller steps that make us feel like we are heading towards success. Here are some tips for breaking down your goal:

1. Try attaching a new habit to an existing one. This is called ‘habit stacking’. Find a well-established habit in your daily routine and put your new habit before or after it. For example, try putting your new habit for a morning walk before your old habit of having a morning coffee.
2. Start small. Big behaviour changes require a high level of motivation that can be difficult to sustain. Starting with a smaller habit and building on it can be more motivating. For example, starting with a 20-minute morning walk and increasing it by 5 minutes a week/day until it gets to 40 minutes.
3. Do it more often. Research shows that the successful formation of a new habit relies on frequency – the more you do it the more likely it is to stick. For a habit to become automatic it takes an average time of 66 days.
4. Make it easy. If your new habit is easy to do you will be more likely to engage with the habit. If you leave your walking shoes by the door where you can see them, it will make it easier for you to go for a walk and you will be more likely to do it.
5. Reward yourself. Immediate rewards are an important ingredient for behaviour change so try building in a reward to your new routine, like listening to a favourite podcast or new audiobook on the treadmill.
6. Do it with someone. Doing healthy activities with others strengthens our social wellbeing and a little friendly competition can make it more fun and motivating.

Solving Problems

by EAP Assist | Nov 15, 2023

Problem solving are systematic approaches used to find solutions to various challenges and issues. Effective problem solving is a valuable skill in both one’s personal and professional life. Common problem-solving strategies that can be applied to various situations are:

1. Define the problem/challenge- understand what needs to be addressed with a complete understanding of the situation.
2. Gather relevant data/information related to the problem- this may involve research, data analysis or input from those who have some knowledge of the problem.
3. Brainstorm a list of possible solutions/approaches. Consider a variety of options and be creative.
4. Assess the pro’s/cons of each potential solution- consider factors such as feasibility, impact, cost and time frame. Determine which solutions are most likely to be effective.
5. Select the best solution that is feasible, practical and aligned with your goals and values. It should have the highest likelihood of addressing the problem.
6. Create a step- by- step action plan that will outline how the solutions are to be implemented- define specific tasks, responsibilities and deadlines.
7. Put your action into motion- execute the steps as outlined in the plan. Monitor progress and make adjustments as needed.
8. Evaluate the outcome- once the solution has been implemented assess the results. Did the solution effectively address the problem? What were the negatives/positives of the outcome.
9. Reflect on the problem-solving process and the outcomes achieved in order to learn from the experience. Identify what worked well and what could be improved upon.
10. If the problem persists or new issues arise be prepared to revisit the problem-solving process. Make adjustments to your approach, gather new information and generate additional solutions if required.
11. Seek feedback from others involved in the process- they may have valuable insights/suggestions
12. Break down complex problems into more manageable one’s
13. Consider multiple perspectives. Collaborative problem solving can lead to more effective solutions.
14. Prioritize problems so that the most urgent and important one is addressed first to avoid becoming overwhelmed by trying to solve multiple problems at once.
15. Practice patience as not all problems can be solved quickly.
16. Stay open to change as solutions may need to be reviewed and adapted.
17. Acknowledge and celebrate your successes/achievements in problem solving. This can boost confidence and motivation.
18. Maintain a positive and solutions focused mindset. Believe in your ability to find effective solutions.

Healthy Habits

by EAP Assist | Oct 21, 2023

The best way to improve our mental health is to improve our sleep, diet or exercise habits and routines. The catch is that it’s not always easy to form better habits around these things. Have you ever said to yourself “Why can’t I stick to my new running routine, or I keep saying I won’t look at my phone before bed” but still do. We often say these things to ourselves but struggle to implement change. Research shows there are a couple of reasons for this. Many of us start with a big goal – like giving up smoking cold turkey, without breaking it down into smaller steps that make us feel like we are heading towards success. Here are some tips for breaking down your goal:

1. Try attaching a new habit to an existing one. This is called ‘habit stacking’. Find a well-established habit in your daily routine and put your new habit before or after it. For example, try putting your new habit for a morning walk before your old habit of having a morning coffee.
2. Start small. Big behaviour changes require a high level of motivation that can be difficult to sustain. Starting with a smaller habit and building on it can be more motivating. For example, starting with a 20-minute morning walk and increasing it by 5 minutes a week/day until it gets to 40 minutes.
3. Do it more often. Research shows that the successful formation of a new habit relies on frequency – the more you do it the more likely it is to stick. For a habit to become automatic it takes an average time of 66 days.
4. Make it easy. If your new habit is easy to do you will be more likely to engage with the habit. If you leave your walking shoes by the door where you can see them, it will make it easier for you to go for a walk and you will be more likely to do it.
5. Reward yourself. Immediate rewards are an important ingredient for behaviour change so try building in a reward to your new routine, like listening to a favourite podcast or new audiobook on the treadmill.
6. Do it with someone. Doing healthy activities with others strengthens our social wellbeing and a little friendly competition can make it more fun and motivating.

Dehydration & Anxiety

by EAP Assist | Oct 20, 2023 

Did you know that dehydration and anxiety are connected? When you are dehydrated, your body becomes anxious as a way to try and preserve energy. This is because when you are dehydrated, your body has to work harder to perform basic functions. Dehydration causes the body to release hormones like adrenaline and cortisol, which are stress hormones. These hormones can lead to feelings of anxiety and irritability.

Dehydration can cause anxiety because of the way it affects our body and brain. When we are dehydrated, our body is not able to function properly. This can lead to increased levels of stress and anxiety. Dehydration can also cause headaches, which can further contribute to feelings of anxiety. In addition, dehydration can cause electrolyte imbalances. This can lead to symptoms such as dizziness, light-headedness and fatigue – all of which can worsen anxiety symptoms.

When you are dehydrated, your blood pressure and heart rate can increase, which can make you feel more anxious. In fact, dehydration is one of the most common causes of anxiety attacks. Dehydration can cause anxiety, and anxiety can worsen the effects of dehydration. If you are feeling anxious, it is important to drink plenty of fluids and stay hydrated.

It is often difficult to tell how much water your body needs. Because our bodies are made up mostly of water, it is important to stay hydrated in order to maintain our health and well-being. The recommended daily intake of water is eight glasses per day. But this may vary depending on your activity level, age, weight and health status. In fact, people have different water needs, so it is important to listen to your body and drink when you are thirsty.

Music for Mental Health

by EAP Assist | Oct 18, 2023

Music is a powerful tool. It can help boost your mood. For centuries, music has played an important role when it comes to our ability to cope through life’s greatest highs and lows. It’s only been in recent years that research has suggested music can help combat depression and anxiety, along with a host of other mental health issues.

Music is said to enhance intelligence and focus, improve mental health and boost the immune system as well as self-esteem and confidence. It can be used to relax, to boost and lift our mood, or to improve concentration. Music can also be used to aid in insomnia, helping to encourage and induce a deeper sleep. Many people have expressed how music is a form of ‘escape’ and can quickly and effectively transport them to a better time, place, or memory. Here are six benefits that music therapy can have on your mental health:

1. Improve Focus on work: There have been numerous studies proving that listening to classical music helps the mind to focus. Music with a tempo of 60 bpm (beats per minute) increases the brain’s ability to process information.
2. As a form of Expression: Music is a wonderful way of expressing emotion and creativity without having to say anything. Whether it’s playing a playlist of your favourite songs with friends or strumming your guitar, music is the perfect non-verbal way of expressing emotions that are too complex to talk about.
3. To Lift the Mood: Playing uplifting songs has a profound effect on the brain, stimulating it to increase feel-good hormones which boost our mood.
4. To Boost Confidence: Subliminal and ambient music such as binaural beat music is proven to assist in anxiety and low confidence. Using alpha waves from 8-14 Hz help the mind get into a more sharpened and confident state of mind. Listening to binaural beat and isochronic tone music is ideal when you’re feeling nervous or fearful. It is believed that the brain syncs to the new frequency introduced by the binaural beat, altering your ‘brain state’ to a more happy, confident sense of being.
5. To Relax: Meditative music has a cathartic effect on us, improving our mood and inducing relaxation of both the body and mind. Research has shown the calming sounds of piano, nature, and string-instruments are very effective in helping you to relax.
6. To Express Anger or Negative Emotion: Music is an incredible vehicle to help us process negative emotion. Listening to ‘angry’ music can be therapeutic when we’re dealing with stress and anger.

Becoming Assertive at Work

by EAP Assist | Oct 17, 2023

Do you often feel as though you fail to get your opinions heard, or that people readily dismiss or undermine your views? Maybe you have a habit of handling situations aggressively or lack the confidence to speak up. You might have felt unable to do anything about it at the time, but by learning how to be more assertive, you can stand up for yourself, and become a strong and confident communicator.

Assertiveness is a key skill that can help you to better manage yourself, people and situations. It can help you to influence others in order to gain acceptance, agreement or behaviour change. It is the ability to express your opinions positively and with confidence. Assertive people are in control of themselves and are honest with themselves and others.

It’s not always easy to identify truly assertive behaviour. This is because there’s a fine line between assertiveness and aggression, and people can often confuse the two. For this reason, it’s useful to define the two behaviours so that we can clearly separate them:
• Assertiveness is based on balance. It requires being forthright about your wants and needs, while still considering the rights, needs and wants of others. When you’re assertive, you are self-assured and draw power from this to get your point across firmly, fairly and with empathy.
• Aggressive behaviour is based on winning. You do what is in your own best interest without regard for the rights, needs, feelings, or desires of other people. When you’re aggressive, the power you use is selfish. You may come across as pushy or even bullying. You take what you want, often without asking.
How to Be Assertive
It’s not always easy to become more assertive, but it is possible. So, if your disposition or workplace tends to be more passive or aggressive than assertive, then it’s a good idea to work on the following areas to help you to get the balance right:

1. Value Yourself and Your Rights
To be more assertive, you need to gain a good understanding of yourself, as well as a strong belief in your inherent value and your value to your organization and team. This self-belief is the basis of self-confidence and assertive behaviour. It will help you to recognize that you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, give you the confidence to stick up for your rights and protect your boundaries, and to remain true to yourself, your wants and your needs.
2. Voice Your Needs and Wants Confidently
If you’re going to perform to your full potential then you need to make sure that your priorities – your needs and wants – are met. Don’t wait for someone else to recognize what you need. You might wait forever. Take the initiative and start to identify the things that you want now. Then, set goals so that you can achieve them. Once you’ve done this, you can tell your boss or your colleague exactly what it is that you need from them to help you to achieve these goals in a clear and confident way. Find ways to make requests that avoid sacrificing others’ needs. Remember, you want people to help you, and asking for things in an overly aggressive or pushy way is likely to put them off doing this and may even damage your relationship.
3. Acknowledge That You Can’t Control Other People’s Behaviour
Don’t make the mistake of accepting responsibility for how people react to your assertiveness. If they, for example, act angry or resentful toward you, try to avoid reacting to them in the same way. Remember that you can only control yourself and your own behaviour, so do your best to stay calm and measured if things get tense. As long as you are being respectful and not violating someone else’s needs, then you have the right to say or do what you want.
4. Express Yourself in a Positive Way
It’s important to say what’s on your mind, even when you have a difficult or negative issue to deal with. But you must do it constructively and sensitively. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and to confront people who challenge you and/or your rights. But remember to control your emotions and to stay respectful at all times.
5. Be Open to Criticism and Compliments
Accept both positive and negative feedback graciously and positively. If you don’t agree with criticism that you receive then you need to be prepared to say so, but without getting defensive or angry.
6. Learn to Say “No”
Saying “no” is hard to do, especially when you’re not used to doing it, but it’s vital if you want to become more assertive. Knowing your own limits and how much work you are able to take on will help you to manage your tasks more effectively, and to pinpoint any areas of your job that make you feel as though you’re being taken advantage of.
7. Review Your Progress
Every time that you try out your assertiveness, spend a couple of minutes afterward asking yourself, “How did I handle that?” “What did I do well?” “What might I do differently next time?” This will keep you on track and help you to identify areas for development.

Assertive Communication Techniques
In addition to the above strategies, there are a number of simple but effective communication techniques that you can use to become more assertive. These are:

“I” Statements
Use “I want”, “I need” or “I feel” to convey basic assertions and get your point across firmly. For example, “I feel strongly that we need to bring in a third party to mediate this disagreement.”
Empathy
Always try to recognize and understand how the other person views the situation. Then, after taking their point of view into consideration, express what you need from them.
Escalation
If your first attempts at asserting yourself have been unsuccessful, then you may need to escalate the matter further. This means becoming firmer (though still polite and respectful) with the person who you are requesting help from and may end in you telling them what you will do next if you still aren’t satisfied, such as starting the disciplinary process.
Ask for More Time
Sometimes, it’s best not to say anything straight away. You might be too emotional or you might not know what it is that you want yet. If this is the case, be honest and tell the person that you need a few minutes to compose your thoughts.
Change Your Verbs
Try using verbs that are more definite and emphatic when you communicate. This will help you to send a clear message and avoid “sugar-coating” your message so much that people are left confused by what it is that you want from them. To do this, use verbs like “will” instead of “could” or “should,” “want” instead of “need,” or “choose to” instead of “have to.”
Be a Broken Record
Prepare the message that you want to convey ahead of time. If people still don’t get the message, then keep restating your message using the same language, and don’t relent. Eventually they will realize that you really mean what you’re saying.
Scripting
It can often be hard to know how to put your feelings across clearly and confidently to someone when you need to assert yourself. The scripting technique can help here. It allows you to prepare what you want to say in advance, using a four-pronged approach that describes:
1. The event. Tell the other person exactly how you see the situation or problem
2. Your feelings. Describe how you feel about the situation and express your emotions clearly.
3. Your needs. Tell the other person exactly what you need from them so that they don’t have to guess.
4. The consequences. Describe the positive impact that your request will have for the other person or the company if your needs are met successfully.
Key Points
Being assertive means finding the right balance between passivity (not assertive enough) and aggression (angry or hostile behaviour). It means having a strong sense of yourself and your value and acknowledging that you deserve to get what you want. And it means standing up for yourself even in the most difficult situations. Being assertive doesn’t mean dominating or dismissing others in order to get what you want. Acting in your own interest without considering other people’s rights, feelings, desires, or needs is aggression.

You can learn to be more assertive over time by identifying your needs and wants, expressing them in a positive way, and learning to say “no” when you need to. You can also use assertive communication techniques to help you to communicate your thoughts and feelings firmly and directly. It likely won’t happen overnight but, by practicing these techniques regularly, you will slowly build up the confidence and self-belief that you need to become assertive. You’ll also likely find that you become more productive, efficient and respected, too.

The Anxiety-Avoidance Cycle

by EAP Assist | Oct 14, 2023

As human beings, it’s normal for us to avoid the things that make us feel anxious or afraid. For some people, though, excessive anxiety can lead to unnecessary and extreme avoidance. In turn, this avoidance can have a hugely negative impact on the way that they function and their overall quality of life. So, let’s look at what anxiety avoidance is, including when it becomes a problem and how to treat it.

In psychology, avoidance is defined as the act of staying away from certain things — such as situations, people, or environments — in order to prevent negative or unwanted thoughts, feelings, or consequences. Avoidance can be a tricky thing, because while you may feel like it’s helping at the time, avoiding the things that make you anxious can actually do more harm than good. Ultimately, continuing to engage in avoidance to prevent feelings of fear or anxiety fuels the cycle and allows both your anxiety and avoidance to grow.

Avoidance is one of the most common safety behaviours and coping mechanisms for people with anxiety disorders, especially those with conditions such as social anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, and OCD. However, frequent avoidance doesn’t just cause an increase in anxiety. It can also have a negative impact on your ability to function in your everyday life.

Why not try a self-help program to help manage your anxiety at: https://eapassist.com.au/treatment-programs/

Relationship Boundaries

by EAP Assist | Oct 11, 2023 

There are a variety of different ways you can go about setting boundaries and here are four approaches to get you started:

1. Begin early
It’s much easier to introduce boundaries at the start of or earlier on in a relationship, rather than years down the road — especially once habits and routines have been established and both partners are more emotionally invested. But if it’s a little late for that tip, don’t worry. Installing boundaries at any point is still better than imposing upon each other until it frays your bond completely.

2. Conversation is key
No matter how awkward you might feel talking about your emotions a two-way discussion is vital in boundary setting. Communication is key to relationships even if they’re really difficult things to talk about. Not only do these discussions help both partners understand the extent and rules of the boundary, but they provide an opportunity to explain why you value a particular boundary. Research suggests that couples who check in regularly and open up experience greater relationship satisfaction overall.

3. Use ‘I’ statements
Communication should start with ‘I feel’. If you lead with superlative or accusatory statements (like “you always” or “you never”), then “you’re going to be hit with a brick wall of ‘That’s not what I think.’ Nobody wants to be criticized or rejected and once those defensive barriers come up, it can be hard to get the conversation back on track. Treat others how you like to be treated, so aim to set boundaries with kindness.

4. It’s OK to ask for space
Whether you’re just starting out with a partner or have been with them for a while, it’s totally acceptable to desire and ask for some me time. It might be that you have a really demanding job and you need half an hour of debrief time when you come home where you don’t talk. There’s a chance your partner might see this request as a form of rejection, so it’s important to take their feelings into account and explain this isn’t the case.

The Anxiety-Avoidance Cycle

by EAP Assist | Oct 14, 2023

As human beings, it’s normal for us to avoid the things that make us feel anxious or afraid. For some people, though, excessive anxiety can lead to unnecessary and extreme avoidance. In turn, this avoidance can have a hugely negative impact on the way that they function and their overall quality of life. So, let’s look at what anxiety avoidance is, including when it becomes a problem and how to treat it.

In psychology, avoidance is defined as the act of staying away from certain things — such as situations, people, or environments — in order to prevent negative or unwanted thoughts, feelings, or consequences. Avoidance can be a tricky thing, because while you may feel like it’s helping at the time, avoiding the things that make you anxious can actually do more harm than good. Ultimately, continuing to engage in avoidance to prevent feelings of fear or anxiety fuels the cycle and allows both your anxiety and avoidance to grow.

Avoidance is one of the most common safety behaviours and coping mechanisms for people with anxiety disorders, especially those with conditions such as social anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, and OCD. However, frequent avoidance doesn’t just cause an increase in anxiety. It can also have a negative impact on your ability to function in your everyday life.

Why not try a self-help program to help manage your anxiety at: https://eapassist.com.au/treatment-programs/

Healthy Eating & Good Mental Health

by EAP Assist | Oct 10, 2023

Healthy eating plays a crucial role in promoting good mental health. Numerous studies have shown a strong connection between our diet and our mental well-being. Here are some key points highlighting the link between healthy eating and good mental health:

1. Nutrient Balance: A balanced diet provides essential nutrients that support brain function and neurotransmitter production. Nutrients like omega-3 fatty acids, B vitamins, magnesium, zinc, and antioxidants are particularly important for mental health.
2. Mood Regulation: Certain foods can directly impact our mood and emotions. For example, complex carbohydrates found in whole grains, fruits, and vegetables help regulate serotonin levels, a neurotransmitter that promotes feelings of happiness and well-being.
3. Gut-Brain Connection: The gut and brain are closely connected through the gut-brain axis. A healthy gut microbiome, which is influenced by our diet, plays a crucial role in producing neurotransmitters and regulating mood. Eating a diet rich in fibre, prebiotics, and probiotics supports a healthy gut microbiome.
4. Inflammation Reduction: Chronic inflammation in the body has been linked to mental health disorders such as depression and anxiety. A diet high in processed foods, sugar, and unhealthy fats can contribute to inflammation, while a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and healthy fats can help reduce inflammation.
5. Energy and Cognitive Function: Proper nutrition provides the energy and nutrients needed for optimal brain function. Eating regular, balanced meals can help stabilize blood sugar levels, providing a steady supply of energy to the brain and improving cognitive function, focus, and concentration.
6. Stress Management: Healthy eating can help manage stress. Stress can lead to emotional eating and cravings for unhealthy foods, but a well-balanced diet can help regulate stress hormones and provide the nutrients needed to support the body’s stress response.
7. Overall Well-being: Good mental health is not just about the absence of mental illness but also about overall well-being. A healthy diet can contribute to improved sleep, increased energy levels, better self-esteem, and a greater sense of overall happiness and life satisfaction.

Ten Questions to Ask Yourself

by EAP Assist | Oct 1, 2023

Sometimes when life gets stressful it feels like we live on auto pilot. Sometimes we go from day to day, often feeling angry and frustrated and resentful and tired and so disillusioned with our lives. We have so much to do and we are often so busy and yet so bored because our daily lives don’t feature activities or experiences that light us up. Here are the questions to ask yourself to create a more fulfilling and ultimately happier life.

1. What are my core values and am I living in alignment with them? Many of us have no idea what our core values are let alone whether we are in alignment with them.

2. What are my non negotiables in my daily life that support my best mental wellbeing. Many of us have great intentions to do things for ourselves and yet often don’t end up doing them because everyone else comes first.

3. What do I want for myself over the next few years. What does my best future look like and how am I going to get there.

4. When I feel stressed, how can I soothe my nervous system so I can be calmer and less anxious? Many of us don’t even know what a calm baseline feels like so think the heightened state of ‘fight or flight’ are normal.

5. What am I doing when I feel most alive?

6. Where do I get a sense of meaning and purpose in my life. If I don’t have that feeling in my current life, what needs to change to add it in.

7. What is my core tendency (obliger, upholder, rebel or questioner) and how can I work with that tendency to understand myself better.

8. How do I show myself self-compassion and self-love.

9. Who energises me in my life and who drains me, and for those who drain me what boundaries do I need to set to protect my energy so I have more time and mental energy.

10. If my life stays on it’s current trajectory and nothing at all changes, how does that make me feel? If the answer is ‘awful’ or ‘disappointed’ or ‘disgusted’ or ‘frustrated’ then change needs to happen. What is the change? Maybe start with the smallest change you could make to have the biggest outcome.

Delay Gratification to achieve Financial Success

by EAP Assist | Sep 20, 2023

In this age of instant gratification, we are bombarded with an endless array of products and services vying for our attention. Flashy advertisements, enticing discounts, and the ease of online shopping have made it increasingly challenging to resist the allure of immediate rewards. Our desire for instant gratification is fuelled by the promise of instant happiness, satisfaction and fulfilment. The thrill of indulging in that luxurious item or the latest gadget can be exhilarating, momentarily providing a sense of pleasure and excitement.

However, the joy of instant gratification is often fleeting. The initial euphoria quickly fades, leaving us craving the next quick fix. This insatiable desire for constant consumption can have significant consequences on our financial wellbeing. Impulse purchases can lead to mounting credit card debts, draining our savings, and hindering our ability to achieve long-term financial goals.

While the allure of instant gratification is hard to resist, there is a powerful alternative: delayed gratification. This superpower empowers us to resist immediate temptations in exchange for more substantial, long-term benefits. The concept of delayed gratification involves the ability to forgo instant rewards and opt for delayed rewards that align with our long-term financial priorities.

Imagine the satisfaction of reaching your goals, whether it’s a dream vacation, buying your dream home, or achieving financial independence. Delayed gratification is the key to making those dreams a reality. By exercising self-control and resisting impulsive purchases, you free up resources that can be channelled towards building a brighter future.

Why delayed gratification is so powerful

1. Achieve Your Financial Goals: Whether it’s saving for a dream vacation, buying your dream home, or building a secure retirement fund, delayed gratification keeps your eyes on the prize. It empowers you to stay focused on your financial goals and make decisions that align with your aspirations.
2. Strengthen Financial Resilience: In times of financial uncertainty, delayed gratification acts as a shield. By curbing impulsive spending, you create a safety net that can weather unexpected challenges, helping you maintain financial stability.
3. Reduce Debt: Impulse purchases often lead to mounting debts. Embracing delayed gratification allows you to break free from this debt cycle, ensuring that your hard-earned money works for your future, not past expenses.
4. Enhance Decision-Making: Delayed gratification gives you the time to assess the pros and cons of a financial choice. As a result, you can make well-informed decisions that align with your long-term financial wellbeing.

How to Cultivate the Art of Delayed Gratification and Impulse Control

1. Create a Financial Vision: Start by setting clear financial goals and envisioning the life you want to lead. This vision will serve as your guiding star, making it easier to resist short-term temptations.
2. Set Up a “Pause Period”: When faced with an impulse purchase, create a “pause period” before making the decision. Sleep on it, give yourself a day or two, and see if the desire persists. Often, you’ll find that the impulse fades away.
3. Track Your Progress: Celebrate the progress you make towards your financial goals. Tracking your achievements keeps you motivated and reinforces the benefits of delayed gratification.
4. Find Alternative Rewards: Instead of instant splurges, explore alternative ways to reward yourself. Treat yourself to experiences, like a day out with friends or a hobby you enjoy, rather than material possessions.
5. Embrace the Joy of Anticipation: Savour the anticipation of reaching your financial milestones. The journey itself can be just as rewarding as the destination.

By mastering delayed gratification and impulse control, you gain the superpower to shape your financial destiny with confidence and wisdom. Embrace the journey, and watch your financial wellbeing soar to new heights.

The Relationship Blame Game

by EAP Assist | Sep 19, 2023

In relationships we can sometimes get stuck in a ‘blame game’. It’s a game of attack and defence that leads to an unhelpful cycle that draws us deeper into conflict. The game usually begins with one partner making a personal judgement about the other like “You’re so self-centred!”. These personal judgements hurt, so the other partner gets defensive and throws back another hurtful comment like “I’m not self-centred! You are!” And then the game goes around in circles gathering every mistake and wrongdoing within reach to create a downward spiral. The blame game creates distance and makes issues even more difficult to resolve. It often leaves us feeling exhausted, misunderstood, and disconnected from our partner. It’s not a fun game.

There is a way to turn the blame game around. Even if only one partner knows the strategy it can still make a difference. The strategy requires one partner to swap out a ‘You’ and sub in an ‘I’. This reverses the downward spiral by changing the tone of the conversation. It can shift the game in a whole new direction.

When we swap ‘You’ out and sub in the ‘I’ it’s like a zoom lens. It moves the focus from a big picture personal attributions like ‘You always or you never’ about our partner to an up-close picture of our own feelings and needs in the moment. “You’re so self-centred!” becomes “I feel left out when you only talk about yourself. I need you to hear me.” When we focus on our own feelings and needs in response to the situation at hand, our partner feels less judged and doesn’t feel the need to defend. It creates room for a compassionate and understanding response that brings you closer together so the issue can be resolved.

Here are some other approaches you can try:
1. Stick to situational facts. Make observations about what is happening now and not comments about the person. For example, instead of saying “You always interrupt me” try saying “When I was talking just now, I wasn’t able to finish what I was saying.”
2. Notice and acknowledge your own feelings and make a request for what you need. For example, instead of throwing back a hurtful comment like “I’m not lazy! You’re lazy!” try “I find it hurtful when you call me lazy. I would like you to see the many things I do around the house.”
3. View emotional responses as unmet needs. An emotionally charged response can be a clue that your partner needs something. For example, when your partner says, “You spend too much time in front of the TV” what they might really mean is “I need you to spend more time with me.”

Map your Life

by EAP Assist | Sep 15, 2023

A life map is a visual representation of all the key moments in time that have shaped who you are, regardless of whether they were happy or sad occasions. You can also think of a life map as a graphical representation of your life, starting from birth and going up until the present day. It can include any event, milestone, or experience that has made an impact on your life.

Many people don’t know what their own “life moment” looks like until later on down the line when trying desperately hard enough to find out where everything went wrong. Let’s take some time now…to learn something about how to trace back our steps, plan for the future and understand our life story up until this point.

There isn’t a single right way to make a life map, as everyone will be unique to them. However, there are some key steps that you can follow to create your own. For you to come up with a good life map, you need the ideal paraphernalia for the job. Here are some of the things you need:
• A piece of paper or canvas
• A pen or pencil
• Some coloured pens or crayons
• A good memory to remember what happened
• Time and patience
CREATING YOUR LIFE MAP

1. Start by identifying the key moments in your life. You need to number them right from the beginning, starting from those that happened at the youngest age you can remember.
2. Draw a big circle on the paper/canvas. Place the key moments at specific points in the circle, using either dates or relative age (e.g. “age 10-13”). It’s always good to use different colours so that you can easily identify different stages in your life.
3. Once you have plotted all of the key moments, it’s time to start filling in some details. This is where things can get really interesting, as you can add as much or as little information as you like. Some people might want to include what they were feeling at the time, while others might just want to write a brief description of what happened.
4. Link the different moments using lines. This will help you know how one event has led to another. It will also help you to see any patterns that have emerged in your life.
5. Finally, once you have finished your drawing, take some time to reflect on it. What did you learn about yourself? What surprised you? How do you feel now that you have seen everything in one place?

You can put your map somewhere where you can see it regularly and reflect on your progress. Sharing it with others can also be helpful, as it allows you to talk about your life with others and get some valuable insights. There are many benefits of creating a visual timeline, and here are just a few:
• It can help you to see your life story up until this point.
• You can identify the key moments that have shaped you into the person you are today.
• It helps you identify any patterns that have emerged in your life.
• It can be a useful way to communicate your life story with others.
• You can use it to plan for your future
• You can use it as a form of self-care.

HOW DO YOU USE YOUR LIFE MAP

There are many ways in which you can use your life map, and here are some ideas:
• Look back on your life and reflect on the different stages you have been through.
• Understand how your past has influenced your present.
• Use it to make decisions about your future.
• Track your progress over time.
• Document important events and milestones.
• Identify patterns in your life.
• Use it as a tool for self-care.
• Share it with your friends and family.

WHAT SHOULD BE IN A LIFE MAP

There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, as everyone’s life map will be unique to them. Even so, there are some key things that you might want to consider including:
• The date or age of each key moment.
• The emotions you were feeling at the time.
• A brief description of what happened.
• The impact that each moment has had on your life.
• How the different moments are linked together.
• Anything else that you find valuable!
Before you pick that piece of paper to start drawing your life map on, here are some tips to help you out:
• Use a large piece of paper or canvas, as you will have plenty of space to fill in details.
• Get creative with the way you layout your life map.
• Also, get creative with how you use the colours. For instance, you can use the colours based on what you were wearing or to represent the emotions attached to that time.
• Labelling each stage of your life is a great way to help keep track of everything.
• Don’t be afraid to add in extra details. The more information you include, the more valuable your life map will be.
• Enjoy the process of creating your life map – it can be really therapeutic.

Towards a Positive Mindset

by EAP Assist | Sep 14, 2023

Developing a positive state of mind that helps you navigate through life’s many challenges won’t happen overnight. However, it’s completely possible. The first thing to know is that positivity starts from within. Positive thoughts impact how you feel. Positive feelings impact how you behave and positive behaviour and decision-making lead to positive outcomes. And then positive outcomes create more positive thoughts.

To begin with, we’re going to offer you some advice on how to turn negative thoughts into positive ones. This is the first step to transforming your mindset and leading a more optimistic life. As said before, being more positive isn’t about being happy all the time. It’s about looking at a situation and seeing how you can transform it into something positive. Try observing negative thoughts and transforming them into positive ones.

So, instead of:
Things are so hard right now, I can’t cope.
Think: Things won’t always be like this, this is only for now and the future will be better.

2. Instead of:
I always make mistakes, I am useless.
Think: It’s okay to make mistakes, I am only human, and mistakes help me to learn.

3. Instead of:
There’s no point in trying, this is impossible to achieve.
Think: This is challenging. But, with hard work and determination, I can achieve this.

4. Instead of:
Why is it always me? I have such bad luck.
Think: Today is just a bad day. Tomorrow will be much better.

5. Instead of:
I deserve bad things to happen to me.
Think: I deserve happiness, health, love, and other good things in my life.

Next time you catch yourself thinking along these lines, stop, acknowledge your thoughts, take a deep breath, and try to rework the statements to make them more positive. This will take time. But with dedication and practice, you can relearn your thought patterns.

Tips to achieve a positive state of mind:

1. Practice gratitude daily
We often forget how lucky we are. We take for granted having food to eat, a roof over our heads and being healthy. But when you stop and really think about it, we’re so lucky to have these in our lives. To reprogram your mind for positive thinking, try to practice gratitude as often as possible. Every morning, think of three things that you are grateful for and write them down in a gratitude journal. On difficult days you can look back at these lists to remind yourself of how much good you have in your life. Or, in the evenings, before you go to bed, think of three things you have been grateful for that day. As you close your eyes to sleep, hold these thoughts in your mind.

2. Embrace positive self-talk
We tend to be our own worst critics. Over time, being so harsh on yourself can impact your self-esteem. Instead, talk to yourself as you would to a close friend. We’re only human and making mistakes is a part of life. You don’t need to be so critical of yourself or things that may not have gone to plan. This is similar to transforming negative thoughts into positive ones. Instead of “I can’t do this because I’ll do it wrong”, think “I can do this if I push myself”.

3. Understand your negativity
Understanding your negative thought process will help you reprogram your mind for positive thinking. Write your negative thoughts down. You might eventually start to see a pattern. Do you have certain triggers? Are your negative thoughts centered around one particular theme or person? Understanding more about your negative thoughts will give you insight into how to control them and avoid possible triggers.

4. Maintain a healthy lifestyle
A healthy lifestyle does wonders for your mental and physical health, which will help you be more optimistic. For example, when you exercise, your body releases neurochemicals that trigger relaxation and a better mood. Likewise, eating a healthy and balanced diet will make you look and feel great. The combination of exercising regularly and eating well will leave you feeling happy, empowered, and unstoppable.

5. Surround yourself with positive people
Both positivity and negativity are contagious. If you surround yourself with negative people, it’ll be more difficult to feel optimistic. However, if you surround yourself with positive people, you’ll absorb this positive energy. Of course, you can’t completely avoid negative people, especially if they’re your work colleagues or family members. So instead, be the one to spread positivity. You never know, your positive energy could help them to think more optimistically as well.

6. Meditate
Mindfulness meditation is the skill of focusing your attention on the present moment. With time and practice, this can help you observe your thoughts and feelings and develop your self-awareness. By meditating regularly and focusing on the present, you aren’t dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. You can make unbiased decisions from a more rational perspective.

The benefits of an optimistic mindset are truly endless. From helping you cope effectively with stress to developing your self-confidence and increasing your quality of life; developing a positive mentality can help you become your best self. With time and practice, you can become a positive thinker and start perceiving your reality differently.

Financial Success

by EAP Assist | Sep 12, 2023

Setting clear financial goals is like charting a course for your future. It provides direction, purpose, and a roadmap to guide your financial decisions. But what exactly does it mean to set clear goals? Clear goals are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound. By defining your financial objectives in this manner, you empower yourself to take action and measure your progress effectively. To begin, ask yourself: What do you want to achieve financially? Whether it’s saving for a dream vacation, paying off debt, or building an emergency fund, clarity is key. Once you have identified your goals, break them down into smaller milestones. This approach allows you to track your progress, celebrate achievements and stay motivated throughout the journey.

While setting clear goals is crucial, maintaining motivation is equally important. Let’s explore some effective techniques to keep your enthusiasm and drive alive as you work towards financial success.

1. Visualise Your Success: Take a moment to envision the future you desire. Create a vivid mental picture of how achieving your financial goals will improve your life. Imagine freedom from debt, the joy of financial stability, or the ability to pursue your passions without constraints. Visualising your success fuels motivation and helps you overcome challenges along the way.
2. Celebrate Milestones: Remember to celebrate your victories, no matter how small they may seem. Each milestone achieved brings you closer to your ultimate goal. Treat yourself to a small reward or indulge in an activity you enjoy. These celebrations act as powerful motivators and remind you of the progress you’ve made.
3. Track Your Progress: Regularly monitor and evaluate your progress. This not only keeps you accountable but also allows you to see how far you’ve come. Consider maintaining a financial journal or using budgeting apps that provide visual representations of your achievements. Seeing the positive impact of your efforts can inspire you to push even further.
4. Surround Yourself with Support: Seek out a supportive community that shares your financial aspirations. Engage with like-minded individuals through forums, social media groups, or local meet ups. Connecting with others who are on a similar journey can provide encouragement, advice, and fresh perspectives when you need them most.
5. Embrace Continuous Learning: Educate yourself about personal finance and wealth management. The more knowledge you acquire, the more confident and motivated you’ll become. Explore books, podcasts, online courses, or seek guidance from financial experts. By continually expanding your understanding, you equip yourself with the tools to make informed decisions and achieve your goals.
6. Maintain Flexibility: Life is full of surprises, and circumstances can change. Stay open to adjusting your goals if necessary. Being flexible allows you to adapt your plans without losing sight of your ultimate financial objectives. Remember, it’s the journey that matters, and the ability to adapt and persevere is a testament to your resilience.

Trolling at Work

by EAP Assist | Sep 9, 2023

Have you ever dealt with someone at work who behaves like some of the most annoying, high-conflict people you’ve encountered in social media settings?

An online troll “someone who leaves an intentionally annoying or offensive message on the internet, in order to upset someone or to get attention or cause trouble.” Similarly, a generic troll is someone who would “intentionally do or say something annoying or offensive in order to upset someone, or to get attention or cause trouble.”

One of the key definitional elements is intent. Troll behaviour is about intentionally trying to get under someone’s skin, even when followed by astonished denials if called out on it. Deeper intentions may vary. The behaviour could be designed simply to annoy or distract a perceived opponent or competitor. Or maybe it’s part of a more orchestrated campaign to undermine a co-worker.

Trolling definitely can be characterized as intentionally aggressive, passive-aggressive, or manipulative in nature. As such, repeated, frequent trolling can be a component of workplace bullying or mobbing.Not every provocative or disagreeable statement or idea is trolling, even if it’s likely to stir discomfort or discontent. For example, just because someone opposes an idea you’ve expressed in a meeting doesn’t mean you’re being trolled. It could happen multiple times, in fact, due to fundamental differences of opinion about the matters at hand.

Furthermore, even when possessing the best of intentions, many of us are capable of saying something annoying or offensive during the course of a spirited conversation. Perhaps we were misunderstood, in which case hopefully we get a chance to explain ourselves more clearly. In circumstances where we said something we regret, then ideally we’d have an opportunity to apologize and possibly change our mind. These instances aren’t trolling, either.
But let’s say you become aware of an individual who often operates in a disingenuous space, frequently setting up “straw men” in discussions or mischaracterizing information or opinions for the apparent purpose of being critical, disruptive, or engaging in button-pushing. And maybe it involves a sort of “stalky” tracking or following of someone to continually hassle them in this way. Well then, that’s troll territory, and whether online or in-person, it’s no fun to deal with.

Trolling and gaslighting are related concepts and practices. Both are intended to mess with someone’s head, and both are typically conducted under a veneer of civility. Gaslighting is a form of deliberate manipulation intended to disorient, confuse, and frighten those on the receiving end. In both intensity of behaviour and malicious intent, a targeted step up from trolling.

Trolls can push people’s buttons. They intend to provoke. And if they push hard enough, they may prompt an angry, accusatory response from the target of their attentions. When that occurs, the trolls may be the first to claim victim status. In workplace bullying situations the perpetrator is an expert button pusher. The target reacts emotionally, perhaps even accusing the perpetrator of wrongdoing, while the latter responds with incredulous disbelief and claims that they are being victimized. The “judo flip” having been completed, the target is put on the defensive.

Dealing with genuine troll behaviours at work
Effective trolls are devious and clever. They contemplate what they’re going to say and how they’re going to say it for maximum effect. In terms of psychological makeup, some of the worst workplace trolls may have a personality disorder, such as narcissism, sociopathy or psychopathy. Despite the diminutive imagery of the term, trolls can be pretty disturbed and determined individuals. It’s one thing to deal with a nasty troll on social media, but it’s quite another to deal with such an individual at work. Put simply, the stakes are typically higher when it involves one’s employment.

For dealing with social media trolls:
• “Avoid the engagement trap.” — In other words, don’t go down the rabbit hole with a troll, having fallen for the bait set out by the troll.
• “Frame the issue from your own viewpoint.” — Use your frame and perspective, not the troll’s.
• “Block liberally.” — Drop, block, mute, unfriend, whatever.
Three rules for surviving trolls at work::
• “Kill them with kindness” — As in most bullying cases, the other person is likely dealing with their own insecurities and is taking it out on others. Show them kindness and empathy, and it will likely suppress the trolling. Don’t let them pull you into their negativity, instead pull them into your serenity.
• “Use humour to counteract.” — Trolls like to make others the brunt of their jokes. They love the reactions and attention it brings from others. However, if you’re wittier than they are, they will likely back down.
• “Address them individually” — When kindnesses and wit doesn’t work, it’s time to call the person out and address the situation face-to-face. When stating how you feel, use “I” statements. They prevent the other person from shifting the blame or minimizing the severity, and they clarify the impact of the person’s behaviour.

Challenging your Way

by EAP Assist | Sep 8, 2023

Have you ever made a resolution to do more exercise? Did you notice at the time you made this resolution how energised and confident you felt? There was no doubt in your mind that you could make it happen. The next day you buy a new pair of running shoes and join the gym to begin working towards being a fitter you. You exercise every day for a couple of weeks and feel great. Then the days get darker and colder. You find you need more energy to jump out of bed early. Slowly your motivation starts to disappear. You begin to tell yourself you just don’t have the discipline to exercise regularly. Your desire to maintain the healthy lifestyle you hoped for so seems far away and you give up.

The old saying ‘where there is a will there is a way’ holds a lot of wisdom. But often we focus more on the will and not on the way. The will is important. Our will helps us connect to a more positive future and provides us with energy to make a change. If everything goes smoothly this might be all we need. However, when it doesn’t go to plan our energy resources quickly run out. This is when we start judging ourselves for not ‘having enough willpower’ or not ‘being disciplined enough’ and we lose our motivation.

This is where the way becomes important too. A way helps us to think ahead so we can direct and redirect our energy. A way ensures we have options that help us to overcome obstacles. If plan A isn’t working, we can move to plan B or Plan C. By doing this it gives us a sense of control that helps us to persist and keep moving towards our goal. When we have a will and a way it helps us to feel positive about ourselves, the world and the future and to view setbacks as challenges. So next time you feel excited about a goal remember that ‘where there is a will – you also need a way’.

The elements of hope that create a ‘will and a way’
A clear specific, measurable and achievable goal that excites you.
Several realistic pathways to create alternative options for achieving your goal.
A plan to overcome the anticipated obstacles for each pathway and keep you motivated when it gets tough.

Cultivating Gratitude

by EAP Assist | Sep 6, 2023  

Research has shown that cultivating gratitude can have a powerful impact on our mental and physical well-being. It can help us feel more connected to others, more resilient in the face of challenges, and more satisfied with our lives overall.

Maybe it’s a manager or colleague who went above and beyond to offer guidance and support. Maybe it’s the CEO who challenged you to think in new ways and pushed you to be your best. Or maybe it’s a friend or family member who was there for you when you needed them most. Whoever it is, take a moment to think about how they have impacted your life. How have they helped you grow and learn? How have they made your experience more enjoyable or fulfilling? And most importantly, how can you show them your gratitude.

One way to turn gratitude into action is to express it directly to the people who have made a difference in your life. Maybe you could write a heartfelt thank-you note or send an email expressing your appreciation. But gratitude doesn’t have to be limited to one-time gestures. You can also cultivate a mindset of gratitude in your daily life. This might mean taking time each day to reflect on what you’re thankful for, or actively seeking out opportunities to show kindness and appreciation to others.

Whatever form your gratitude takes, remember that it’s a powerful tool for cultivating compassion and connection. By taking the time to acknowledge and appreciate the people who have helped us along the way, we can create a more supportive and caring community for everyone. And let’s commit to showing our gratitude in tangible ways, both now and in the future. Because when we cultivate gratitude and compassion, we create a brighter, more positive world for all.

The Military Sleep Method

by EAP Assist | Sep 5, 2023

1.Close your eyes, breathe slowly, blow away your tensions.
2. Relax the forehead, relax the eyes.
3. Relax the jaw, and let your mouth hang open, relaxing the tongue and lips.
4. Drop the shoulders, relax each arm, the elbow, the wrist, your fingers.
5. Relax the chest and rib cage, and mentally allow your midriff to sprawl.
6. Feel the state of relaxation and associate it with the word ‘calm’.
7. As dreamily as you can, check that your face and upper body aren’t tensing up. Don’t look for a problem, instead feel for how relaxed you are.
8. Relax each legs, feet, ankles, calves, knees and the thighs.
9. Clear your mind by imagining yourself in a peaceful scene, such as lying in the bottom of a still canoe on a perfectly flat pond and avoid all thought of movement.
10. Say the words “don’t think” for 10 seconds. And you should soon be asleep.

Manage that Inner Critic

by EAP Assist | Sep 4, 2023

Have you ever noticed that it is easier to show compassion to others than it is to ourselves. When someone we love makes a mistake, we say “don’t worry just use this as an opportunity to learn and try again”. Whereas if we make a mistake ourselves, we say “What’s wrong with me, I can’t do anything right”. Often, we are much more tolerant towards the failures and weaknesses in others than we are to the failures and weakness in ourselves.

This is the work of our ‘inner critic’. A sometimes very loud internal voice with well-meaning intentions but outdated motivational techniques. The inner critic’s goal is to protect us and help us achieve. It tries to help by controlling and fixing the problem and uses criticism and harsh rebukes. It says things like “you are hopeless or what’s wrong with you” to try and get you to measure up. What it actually does is makes us feel ashamed, embarrassed or guilty for not “being good enough”. This makes it more difficult to take positive steps towards change.

There is another inner voice that also wants the best for us. Our ‘inner coach’ is a supportive and patient teacher who encourages us to accept our failures as part the human condition. The inner coach says, “You got this” and creates space for us to comfort and reassure ourselves that even though we failed at a particular task we are not a failure. The inner coach helps us feel optimistic and hopeful that we can take action to grow.

The easiest way to tell the difference between the inner critic and the inner coach is self-compassion. Self-compassion is offering to ourselves the same care and concern as we would a friend. Imagine what you would say to a close friend who lost a big client at work. It most probably involves words of kindness, reassurance and acceptance. Self-compassion is offering yourself the same reassurance and acceptance when things don’t go well. When we do this, it turns up the volume of our inner coach and puts us on a path towards change.

Savouring your Wellbeing

by EAP Assist | Sep 1, 2023

Developing a positive financial mindset is not just about having a healthy relationship with money; it has far-reaching implications for our overall financial wellbeing. Here are some reasons why cultivating a positive financial mindset is essential:

1. Sound Financial Decision-Making: A positive financial mindset empowers us to make informed and rational decisions about our money. It helps us think critically about financial opportunities, assess risks and weigh the long-term consequences of our choices. By cultivating a positive financial mindset, we can avoid impulsive decisions and make choices that align with our goals and values.

2. Emotional Resilience: Financial setbacks and challenges are an inevitable part of life. However, a positive financial mindset helps us develop emotional resilience in the face of adversity. It enables us to view setbacks as temporary hurdles rather than insurmountable barriers, allowing us to bounce back stronger and more determined to achieve financial success.

3. Financial Security: A positive financial mindset promotes habits and behaviours that contribute to long-term financial security. It encourages us to prioritise saving, manage debt responsibly, and plan for the future. By focusing on financial security, we can better weather unexpected financial emergencies and build a solid foundation for our financial wellbeing.

4. Reduced Stress and Anxiety: Financial stress can take a toll on our mental and physical health. Cultivating a positive financial mindset helps reduce stress and anxiety surrounding money matters. When we approach our finances with a positive outlook, we can better manage financial challenges, find solutions to problems, and maintain a sense of calm and control.

5. Empowerment and Self-Confidence: Developing a positive financial mindset empowers us to take charge of our financial lives. It fosters a sense of self-confidence in our ability to make wise financial choices and achieve our financial goals. With this confidence, we can navigate financial systems, negotiate better deals, and seek opportunities for growth and financial success.

6. Alignment with Values and Purpose: A positive financial mindset allows us to align our financial decisions with our values and purpose in life. It helps us prioritise spending on what truly matters to us, whether it’s supporting causes we care about, investing in personal growth, or building a secure future for our loved ones. By aligning our financial actions with our values, we create a greater sense of fulfilment and satisfaction.

Cultivating a positive financial mindset is an ongoing journey that requires self-awareness, learning and practice. It is not about ignoring financial challenges or pretending that everything is perfect, but rather about adopting a constructive mindset that allows us to navigate financial complexities with resilience, confidence, and optimism. By nurturing a positive financial mindset, we can transform our relationship with money, unlock our financial potential, and create a more secure and fulfilling future.

How to De-escalate an Angry Person

by EAP Assist | Aug 31, 2023

Anger is an intense emotion you feel when something has gone wrong or someone has wronged you. It is often difficult enough to manager the anger you may be feeling, but it can also be scary or worrying to try and deal with someone else that is struggling to manage their anger. When there are signs of anger or verbal aggression it is important to remember that:

· you need to stay calm
· anger may be a sign that the person is in distress, experiencing fear or frustrated
· it is not possible to reason or problem solve with someone who is enraged
· effective communication skills are the key to settling, resolving and de-escalating a situation.

Use the strategies below to de-escalate a situation:

· Listen to what the issue is and the person’s concerns.
· Offer reflective comments to show that you have heard what their concerns are.
· Wait until the person has released their frustration and explained how they are feeling.
· Look and maintain appropriate eye contact to connect with the person.
· Incline your head slightly, to show you are listening and give you a non-threating posture.
· Nod to confirm that you are listening and have understood.
· Express empathy to show you have understood.

Remember it is not your job to stop the person being angry, but these steps may help to make the person feel calmer. It is only then that you can look at how to deal with the situation and their concerns.

Creating a Positive Financial Mindset

by EAP Assist | Aug 30, 2023

Developing a positive financial mindset is not just about having a healthy relationship with money; it has far-reaching implications for our overall financial wellbeing. Here are some reasons why cultivating a positive financial mindset is essential:

1. Sound Financial Decision-Making: A positive financial mindset empowers us to make informed and rational decisions about our money. It helps us think critically about financial opportunities, assess risks and weigh the long-term consequences of our choices. By cultivating a positive financial mindset, we can avoid impulsive decisions and make choices that align with our goals and values.

2. Emotional Resilience: Financial setbacks and challenges are an inevitable part of life. However, a positive financial mindset helps us develop emotional resilience in the face of adversity. It enables us to view setbacks as temporary hurdles rather than insurmountable barriers, allowing us to bounce back stronger and more determined to achieve financial success.

3. Financial Security: A positive financial mindset promotes habits and behaviours that contribute to long-term financial security. It encourages us to prioritise saving, manage debt responsibly, and plan for the future. By focusing on financial security, we can better weather unexpected financial emergencies and build a solid foundation for our financial wellbeing.

4. Reduced Stress and Anxiety: Financial stress can take a toll on our mental and physical health. Cultivating a positive financial mindset helps reduce stress and anxiety surrounding money matters. When we approach our finances with a positive outlook, we can better manage financial challenges, find solutions to problems, and maintain a sense of calm and control.

5. Empowerment and Self-Confidence: Developing a positive financial mindset empowers us to take charge of our financial lives. It fosters a sense of self-confidence in our ability to make wise financial choices and achieve our financial goals. With this confidence, we can navigate financial systems, negotiate better deals, and seek opportunities for growth and financial success.

6. Alignment with Values and Purpose: A positive financial mindset allows us to align our financial decisions with our values and purpose in life. It helps us prioritise spending on what truly matters to us, whether it’s supporting causes we care about, investing in personal growth, or building a secure future for our loved ones. By aligning our financial actions with our values, we create a greater sense of fulfilment and satisfaction.

Cultivating a positive financial mindset is an ongoing journey that requires self-awareness, learning and practice. It is not about ignoring financial challenges or pretending that everything is perfect, but rather about adopting a constructive mindset that allows us to navigate financial complexities with resilience, confidence, and optimism. By nurturing a positive financial mindset, we can transform our relationship with money, unlock our financial potential, and create a more secure and fulfilling future.

Financial Counselling Support Services

by EAP Assist | Aug 24, 2023 

Financial counsellors provide free, confidential and independent advice to people who have money and debt problems, so that they understand their options and get back on track. Financial counsellors differ from financial planners and advisors in that they don’t recommend products or advise people on how to invest. Financial counselling is always free. If someone says that they are offering financial counselling and want to charge for the service, it’s likely they are breaking the law.

The National Debt Helpline is the national phone financial counselling service. It’s never too early or late to call the National Debt Helpline on 1800 007 007 – open weekdays from 9.30am to 4.30pm. The National Debt Helpline website also has a live chat service. Live chat is available 9am to 8pm weekdays. Go to: https://ndh.org.au/

Other national support services include Way Forward & Credit Smart.

Way Forward is a not-for-profit organisation whose sole purpose is to help people manage and repay their debts. Way Forward can help if you have debts across multiple banks, are experiencing financial difficulty and would benefit from someone working with the banks on your behalf. Go to: www.wayforward.org.au

Credit Smart is an online self-help resource designed by the Australian Retail Credit Association. The information, tools and strategies on the site are designed to help you understand credit reporting and how you can view, control or repair your credit information. Go to: www.creditsmart.org.au

What is Eco-anxiety

by EAP Assist | Aug 23, 2023

“Eco-anxiety” is a newer term but has become widely known as more begin to understand the severity and urgency of the ongoing environmental crisis; it is a form of anxiety related to environmental issues, including climate change, pollution, deforestation, species extinction, overpopulation and other environmental challenges.

Understandably, ‘doomscrolling’ (the act of spending an excessive amount of time reading negative news online) and seeing keywords like “torrential floods,” “melting ice sheets,” “rainfall warning,” or “heat wave” can increase environmental anxiety.

Eco-anxiety can lead to helplessness, despair, and loss of hope for the future—especially for Gen Z or those born between 1997 and 2012. Climate anxiety is greatest for Gen Z, who have been bombarded with news of climate disasters on social media and in the news. They “feel betrayed by government inaction” and upset when told they are “overreacting to what they see as an existential threat.” Close to 40% of Gen Z surveyed also said that fears about the future have made them reluctant to have children one day.

Eco-anxiety, like generalized anxiety, involves excessive worry and fear about the future. However, eco-anxiety is a specific type of anxiety that is rooted in concerns about the environment.

The issue of climate change can often be politicized, and although we can challenge and reframe our anxious thoughts around environmental issues, eco-anxiety centres on valid concerns about the planet. Current climate issues are complex, and it is natural to feel concerned about the impact of climate change on our lives. Nonetheless, it is important to note that eco-anxiety can have similar symptoms and treatments as generalized anxiety, like cognitive-behavioural therapy, as well as other therapeutic and relaxation techniques.

To minimize and manage Eco-anxiety prioritize your mental health by:

• Connect with like-minded people. Join a local environmental group or participate in environmental campaigns. Studies show that connecting with like-minded people can reduce isolation and provide a sense of community and purpose.
• You may get tired of hearing it, but it’s essential to practice self-care. Engage in activities that help reduce stress (exercise, meditation, or spending time in nature or with pets).
• Learn more about how you can educate yourself on environmental issues and take action/concrete steps to reduce your environmental impact, like reducing energy consumption and recycling.

Engage in a Mindful Way.

69% of Gen Z feel anxious after seeing online content about climate change and we live in a time where we have constant access to news and information. Staying informed about current events is important, and it’s amazing how technology allows us to learn news so quickly; however, too much exposure to negative news can worsen anxiety and stress. We know that when it comes to anxiety, it is best to act not avoid. But taking a break doesn’t necessarily mean avoiding, and sometimes, when it comes to climate news, a break is a must.

• Be mindful of how much news you consume. Some people strive to remain up-to-date on the latest news to show that they care about the world around them. Staying informed is essential, and caring about your peers is fantastic, but limiting your exposure to negative information to protect your well-being is equally important. Try to find a balance to protect your mental health.
• Minimize anxiety around climate news by setting app time limits. Because social media and news apps can be significant sources of stress and anxiety, consider setting app time limits to help manage your screen time and reduce exposure to negative news.
• Choose your news sources carefully, as not all are created equal. Try to stick with outlets that are reputable, unbiased, and trustworthy. Avoid sources that sensationalize news stories or rely on clickbait headlines.
• Talk about it when you’re comfortable, but when eco-discussions spike your anxiety, you don’t have to say, “I can’t talk about this,” or “I am avoiding the news for my mental health.” Shutting a subject down abruptly can sometimes anger those who are passionate about a subject. Instead, you can briefly listen and express that you haven’t yet read up on the issue yet to inform an opinion before changing the subject.

Taking a break from the news cycle and prioritizing your mental well-being is okay (and even recommended). Why not try the free MindShift CBT app that helps you challenge and overcome anxiety at: https://www.anxietycanada.com/resources/mindshift-cbt/

Workplace Collaboration supports Mental Health

by EAP Assist | Aug 22, 2023

Workers who collaborate more often with colleagues experience fewer mental health challenges than those who prefer to work alone, results of a recent survey show.

An online survey of 5,000 U.S. workers whose jobs required them to collaborate with co-workers “all the time” had a mental health index score of 72.9. Meanwhile, employees who said they prefer to work alone “most of the time” had a score of 66.7. The national average was 70.9.

Nearly half of the respondents indicated they need to collaborate with co-workers some of the time, and that group’s mental health index score (70.5) hovered around the national average. The score for employees who prefer to work alone “some of the time” was 73.3. The mental health index score for the 15% of the workers who said they don’t collaborate at all, 67.8, was below the national average.

The survey concluded that positive relationships are an essential buffer for stress. This underscores the need for workplaces to foster a culture that encourages connection and social support.

Striving for Financial Wellbeing

by EAP Assist | Aug 21, 2023

Financial wellbeing involves having control over current and future finances, providing the security to pursue life’s goals. It means having resources to cover needs and manage unexpected expenses without excessive stress. Achieving it involves informed decisions, navigating financial systems and fostering a balanced relationship with money, integrating emotional and mental wellbeing with financial stability.

This multidimensional concept combines objective aspects like income and savings with subjective experiences such as satisfaction and peace of mind. It’s an ongoing journey requiring financial knowledge, responsible behaviours and skills for overall financial health. Striving for financial wellbeing empowers individuals to set clear goals, align budgets with aspirations, track income and expenses, and make sound choices for a more secure and fulfilling life.

In today’s world, the burden of the living costs crisis has reached unprecedented levels, impacting individuals and families across various socio-economic backgrounds. Housing costs have soared, making it difficult for many to find affordable and stable homes. Education expenses continue to rise, creating barriers to accessing quality education and hindering opportunities for personal and professional growth. Moreover, the escalating prices of daily essentials like food, healthcare and transportation add to the financial strain experienced by people worldwide.

While addressing these systemic issues is essential, it’s equally vital for individuals to learn how to navigate financial pressure and stress without sacrificing their mental health. Practical steps such as budgeting, seeking financial advice from experts and exploring debt relief options can help individuals regain control over their finances and reduce stress levels.

Developing a positive financial mindset can empower individuals to make better financial decisions and stay motivated to achieve their goals. Learning the art of delayed gratification and impulse control can help in curbing impulsive spending habits and save for the future. Additionally, practical strategies for managing financial stress, like setting realistic expectations and focusing on achievable goals, can lead to a more resilient approach to handling financial challenges. Practical tips to consider along the way include:

1. Budget with Purpose: Take a closer look at your finances, identify areas where adjustments can be made, and set realistic goals. Prioritise your spending to align with what truly matters to you.
2. Community Connections: Reach out to local organisations, community centres, and online forums to connect with others facing similar challenges. Share experiences, seek advice and support one another.
3. Mindful Consumption: Be mindful of your spending habits and make conscious choices. Consider sustainable alternatives, support local businesses and practice gratitude for what you already have.
4. Continuous Learning: Educate yourself about personal finance, investment strategies and smart money management. Knowledge is power, and with the right information, you can make informed decisions that contribute to your financial wellbeing.

Move to Improve your Mental Health

by EAP Assist | Aug 10, 2023

Feeling a bit low, fatigued, isolated and lacking motivation can be a bit of a barrier to physical activity. However, research shows though that movement can play an important role in shifting the dial towards better brain health. Recent findings from the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare highlight how mental and physical health are intricately linked.

People who reported having a mental illness were much more likely to report having a chronic medical condition, and vice versa. Females were more likely than males to experience physical problems correlating to mental illness. For many people, physical movement is a key factor for enhanced mental wellbeing, enabling them to live with less stress, greater confidence and a kinder ageing process.

NATURE’S ANTIDEPRESSANT
Physical movement triggers the release of chemicals that preserve brain function, improve focus and kickstart the repair of damaged nerve cells. These chemicals have the added benefit of an immediate feelgood factor, acting as a circuit-breaker for a low mood. Endorphins, which are often referred to as nature’s antidepressants, reduce pain perception and trigger a positive feeling, like that produced by morphine. Terms like “runners high” can be attributed to dopamine (which regulates mood and motivation, among other functions) and serotonin (affecting mood, sleep, and sexual desire), which flood the body during activity. Both are depleted in people with depression; exercise is a natural way of stimulating their release.

IN THE MOOD FOR MOVEMENT
Being physically active has a balancing impact on the hormones cortisol (the stress responder) and insulin (a metabolism and blood glucose regulator). Scientists have recently discovered insulin resistance increases a person’s risk of major depressive disorder. Exercise can help reduce or eliminate this hormonal condition, which is believed to affect as many as one in three Australians and often precedes a diagnosis of type 2 diabetes.

In women, fluctuating levels of oestrogen and progesterone create side effects and challenges at different life stages. Exercise can help in adapting to these changes and potential consequences including weight gain, osteoporosis (bone loss) and menopausal symptoms such as insomnia, hot flashes and depression. One study comparing Australian women across various life stages found that exercisers were more positive and had better memory than non-exercisers. Another study on the effects of aerobic exercise concluded that it may assist in the alleviation of some menopausal symptoms.

Consider these tips when moving for a healthier mind:
• Start small and at your own pace – Enjoyable movement is sustainable movement!
• Socialise your exercise – Connecting with others is a rewarding way to move more.
• Get out and about – Fresh air and a change of scene cost nothing but bring a raft of payoffs for mind and body.
• Celebrate feeling great – Focus on how you feel over how you look.

Beating Financial Stress

by EAP Assist | Aug 8, 2023

Financial stress is a form of stress that can impact on you and your health. By focusing on self-care and prevention, not only will you alleviate some of the symptoms of financial stress, but you’ll be more resilient when pressure mounts. Minimising financial stress will also help you work more efficiently during business hours and allow you to be present in your home life. Below are some tips to help:

Organise, categorise and schedule your finances
Good records make it easier to manage money.

Get help for managing finances
This might be financial advice, financial counselling or if possible, someone to help manage your finances. Consider the benefits not just monetarily, but for your wellbeing and peace of mind.

Make a plan and set short and long-term goals
Planning and goal setting will help you see in advance when finances might be strained and allow you to deal with issues before they lead to stress.

Keep personal and business finances separate
Try to keep separate bank accounts, credit cards, and legal identities for business, or at least keep a good record of when you’re using personal items for business and replenish them when you can.

Don’t panic if you make mistakes
If you make an error, work to resolve it quickly and move forward. Try to keep the big picture in mind.

Deal with debt
If debt is a serious concern for you, consider whether there are ways to negotiate, consolidate or plan a settlement. It’s always better to deal with debt early before it becomes a bigger problem.

Useful resources include:

Welcome Page

https://www.asbfeo.gov.au/my-business-health/categories/cash-flow

Three Good Free Apps

by EAP Assist | Aug 7, 2023

MoodMission
MoodMission helps you learn new and better ways of coping with low moods and anxiety. Tell MoodMission how you’re feeling and it will give you a tailored list of 5 Missions that can help you feel better. Missions are activities and mental health strategies that are quick, easily achievable, and backed up by scientific evidence. MoodMission is based in cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), which is an evidence-based psychological therapy for anxiety and depression. Anyone can use MoodMission, whether you just want a lift in your day or need a bit more help recovering from anxiety or depression.
https://au.reachout.com/tools-and-apps/moodmission

ReachOut WorryTime
Everyone has worries pop into their head from time to time, but sometimes they won’t go away and start to impact your everyday life. ReachOut WorryTime interrupts this repetitive thinking by setting aside your worries until later, so you don’t get caught up in them and can get on with your day. This means you can deal with worries once a day, rather than carrying them around with you 24/7. Produced in consultation with the Centre for Clinical Interventions, ReachOut WorryTime is based on cognitive behavioural techniques that are used by health and wellbeing practitioners to assist people with anxiety and stress.
https://au.reachout.com/tools-and-apps/reachout-worrytime

Breathe2Relax
Breathe2Relax provides instructions for deep breathing exercises that can help reduce stress. Deep breathing has been shown to improve mood and deal with anger and anxiety. It can be used wherever you are, as a standalone tool or combined with other therapies.
https://au.reachout.com/tools-and-apps/breathe2relax

Video on how to make Stress your Friend

by EAP Assist | Aug 4, 2023

Stress, it makes your heart pound, your breathing quicken and your forehead sweat. But while stress has been made into a public health enemy, new research suggests that stress may only be bad for you if you believe that to be the case. Psychologist Kelly McGonigal urges us to see stress as a positive and introduces us to an unsung mechanism for stress reduction: reaching out to others. To watch this video go to:

Video on how to make Stress your Friend - EAP Assist

The Role of Sleep in Physical and Mental Health Webinar

by EAP Assist | Aug 2, 2023

The Sleep Health Foundation is exciting to be launching the Sleep Seminar Series – a new webinar series that focuses on a different sleep topic each month to help provide educational resources to the public.

The first episode of the series is guest hosted by Prof Greg Murray from Swinburne University, as he discusses the role of sleep in physical and mental health and provides helpful tips about how to manage your sleep.

Sleep Seminar Series - The role of sleep in physical and mental health with Prof Greg Murray - YouTube

Mental Health Warning Signs

by EAP Assist | Jul 29, 2023

Below is a list of warning signs to start looking out for when it comes to mental health. Creating awareness around these signs could enable us to help one another, help ourselves and potentially address issues before they worsen.

Behavioural signs:
Noticeable and sudden changes in behaviour or mood could be indicative of a brewing mental health issue. This may manifest in various ways, such as uncharacteristic irritability, excessive sadness or increased anxiety. Similarly, a distinct disregard for personal hygiene, using substances like alcohol or drugs as a coping mechanism, or experiencing drastic alterations in sleep or eating patterns might also point toward underlying mental health concerns.
• Sudden changes in behaviour or mood
• Neglecting personal hygiene
• Using substances like alcohol or drugs as a coping mechanism
• Disturbed sleep or eating patterns

Emotional signs:
Persistently experiencing feelings of sadness or hopelessness, despite the absence of a concrete reason, is a common emotional sign of mental health problems. Additional indicators could be excessive and often irrational worry, fear or guilt. Extreme mood swings, bouts of unexplained anger, or a pervasive feeling of disconnection or detachment from reality could be symptomatic of a potential issue.
• Persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness
• Excessive worry, fear or guilt
• Extreme mood swings or unexplained anger
• Feeling disconnected or detached from reality

Physical signs:
On a physical level, chronic fatigue or low energy levels, unaccounted physical discomforts like recurring headaches or digestive issues, significant weight loss or gain, or sleep disturbances—either hypersomnia (sleeping too much) or insomnia (sleeping too little)—may all be indicative of mental health issues.
• Chronic fatigue or low energy
• Unexplained physical discomforts, like headaches or digestive issues
• Significant weight loss or gain
• Sleep disturbances, either sleeping too much or too little

Cognitive signs:
Cognitive signs often revolve around a person’s mental processes. Trouble concentrating or remembering things, confused or disorganized thinking, and an overwhelming inability to cope with daily problems or stress may be signs of mental health decline. More extreme cognitive signs might include experiencing delusions or hallucinations.
• Trouble concentrating or remembering things
• Confused thinking
• Inability to cope with daily problems or stress
• Experiencing delusions or hallucinations